Trans mum who hates Father’s Day slams ‘gender holidays’ and insists of ‘parents day’ instead
A transgender woman who HATES FATHER’S DAY has slammed the upcoming holiday and insists it be replaced with ‘Parent’s Day’ instead to ‘respect gender diversity’.
Single mum-of-one Stephanie Daugherty, 26, made the life-changing decision to come out as transgender in September 2017 after enduring a ‘torturous’ lifetime of being ‘trapped in the wrong body’.
The pipe layer from Indiana, USA, admitted she was scared to reveal her true self to her daughter Zevaeh – but said the 8-year-old is her ‘biggest supporter’ and switched from calling her ‘dad’ to ‘mum’ instantly.
Stephanie said the upcoming Father’s Day weekend in the USA [JUNE 17] had been a source of anxiety for months – but has decided to ‘reclaim’ the holiday and make it her own by celebrating a second Mother’s Day with her daughter.
But the mum has slammed ‘gender holidays’ and insists they should be replaced with ‘Parent’s Day’ instead to accommodate children with transgender and non-binary parents.
Stephanie said: “I’ve always hated Father’s Day ever since my daughter was born. “Before coming out as transgender, we’d always celebrate the day together. “Looking back at pictures, I’d always be smiling but inside I was dying.
“I feel like a woman and should have been a mother from day one. “I should have been able to carry her in me as a baby, not stuck in a male body being given labels that I don’t identify with. “I always dreaded Father’s Day because it was just a reminder of my inner turmoil.
“This year I actually wanted to skip the day altogether and not celebrate at all. “But when I suggested this to Zevaeh, she got really upset. She knows it’s a special day.
“So I said, ‘why don’t we have a second Mother’s Day?’ and she was really excited for that idea. “I’m still a bit worried about it. “We should ditch Mother’s and Father’s Day and just have ‘Parent’s Day’.
“That way we can just do away with the labels altogether. “It would make it far more comfortable for everyone. “Lots of children have transgender parents or non-binary parents. Some children only have a mum or a dad.
“So to just have an all-inclusive ‘Parent’s Day’ would be much better. “At the end of the day, we’re all just parents trying to be the best we can be no matter what gender we identify with.”
Stephanie lived her entire life being known as Michael to her family and friends – but said that deep down she always knew she should have been born female.
Following her first intimate encounter with a woman when she was 16-years-old, Stephanie was shocked to discover that she was going to become a teenage father.
After her daughter Zevaeh was born in 2010, Stephanie said that she did her best to embrace the role of being a devoted dad, hiding the fact that she longed to be known as her mother instead.
But after finally coming out as transgender last year, the loving parent broached the topic of her gender identity with her daughter – who
Stephanie said was more ‘understanding and supportive’ than most adults. Stephanie now lives full time as a woman and said her daughter made the choice to call her ‘mummy’ straight away. She said: “I was blessed as a father to build such a great bond with her.
“She grew up such a spoiled daddy’s girl and was always attached to my hip. “We’re so close, and I think all of that has to do with always feeling like a mother inside. “I started to come out to my daughter in stages last year.
“We would get matching leggings and would paint each other’s toes the same colour, I started to talk to her about how love is love, and we would watch shows like Modern Family together which I think normalised it.
“I was so nervous telling her that I was going to transition into a woman. “We were having a day out at the park, and I just told her that I’ve always felt like a girl not a boy. “I asked her how she would feel if I became a girl. She said, ‘what do you mean?’.
“I explained to her how her mummy has long hair and wears dresses and makeup and said that I wanted to do that as well. “She was so excited and really happy for me. I couldn’t believe how accepting she was.
“I cried my eyes out. She said, ‘I’ll love you no matter what and I want you to be happy’. “Then she began telling me all the girly things we were going to start doing together. “She called me mummy ever since then. It’s an incredible feeling.
“She watches me do my makeup and plays with my hair as it grows and brags hers is longer. “We paint our nails together and have matching swimsuits.
“She pushes me so much when I feel like I’m embarrassed or nervous. “She is by far my biggest supporter, and loves me unconditionally without judgement. “The world could learn so much from her.”
While she is not in a relationship with Zeveah’s mother, Stephanie said she is completely supportive of her transition and the pair work
together to raise their daughter.
And while she currently works in a stereotypically-male environment on excavation sites, she dreams of being a makeup artist – and said wants to support trans parents around the world.
Despite feeling ‘apprehensive’ about celebrating Father’s Day, Stephanie said she feels confident in reclaiming the day and making it her own, Stephanie said: “You can’t run from it, so why not just embrace the day and make it yours.
“We’re going to have a great time together anyway, so I wouldn’t deny my daughter that chance. “It’s all about celebrating being a parent, which is the best part about my life.
“When I started being my true self I gained this happiness I’ve never felt before. “I finally felt free and like I could breathe. “You always need to be honest with your children. If you’re not happy they can feel that tension.
“A child is as loving and accepting as you raise them to be. “They deserve the best you that you can be even if that means stepping out of the comfort of society’s standards. “My bond with my daughter has never been stronger. She is my entire world.”